THE RELENTLESS, GENTLE LOVE OF GOD
I've been sitting here looking at my cat... Dumpster.
She is lying sprawled out on the floor without a care in the world. She knows she has enough to eat and drink and that she will be well taken care of.
I remember when I first met her at the shelter. She was emaciated and stressed. She was afraid of every thing and everyone. You couldn't hug her as her bones were so sharp they would poke through her flesh. She was a sad, scared little animal found locked in a dumpster surviving on plastic to eat. We figured out the plastic diet as she sought it out at our house when we brought her home. She would sleep with her head half in her bowl of food worried that it may get away from her. If she could see the bottom of her food bowl, she would cry and shake and have a full blown panic attack. It was sad to watch. We would (or I would) scurry around quickly to meet her needs so she would calm down. Clearly, she was traumatized and didn't yet trust her new digs. Over time as the food bowl was always full to the brim and the water was cool and fresh daily and the pets and hugs were readily available when she wanted them, she began "head booping" the walls and doorways of the house. That's a sign of affection and trust from a cat. Then she took a shine to Joe and would lay on the floor next to his feet and occasionally bite a toe. Then it was an occasional visit on the couch, at a distance but there just the same. It was a slow and careful attempt at trust over a long time that brought her to where she is today. Today she is up in the bedroom at 6am screaming for us to get up and change her water. She steals my seat on the couch. She lays in the general pathways in the house so we have to step over her. She sleeps with her head in my shoes. If I lay down a basket for a second in between trips to get veggies from the garden she hops in and goes to sleep. She follows me like a dog, talking the whole time and trying to trip me up. She can't wait for Joe or I to sit down, as she plops as tightly as she possibly can to us...She loves to get on the bed and sleep on my feet... Needless to say she has come to a place of trust with her humans.
Gotta say, it took a lot of patience and love to bring this little kitten to a place where she could enjoy her life and rest in the fact that her needs would be met and there would be no more dumpsters to be locked in. I can't even imagine how much God has had to do to get me to the same place. So many dumpsters in my life.... They all had to be dealt with. And in each one was trauma, trauma, trauma and more trauma. Can't say I'm '' head-booping" the walls, but I am certainly in a better place than I was for the first 2/3 of my life!!!! All that to say this.....We have an AMAZING God who pursues us and wants to spend time with us and wants to meet our needs and wants us to heal from the past. He is so patient with our brokenness and so understanding of our stubbornness. Nothing stops Him from beckoning us to come close. He just keeps trying..and trying...and that's what won me over...just like little Dumpster.... I found someone I could trust, someone that was always there for me...someone who loved me through my brokenness and out of my heartache.
And as for Dumpster...I totally get it... because I just want to curl up on His lap and rest.
by
Pastor Teena Lancellotti
She is lying sprawled out on the floor without a care in the world. She knows she has enough to eat and drink and that she will be well taken care of.
I remember when I first met her at the shelter. She was emaciated and stressed. She was afraid of every thing and everyone. You couldn't hug her as her bones were so sharp they would poke through her flesh. She was a sad, scared little animal found locked in a dumpster surviving on plastic to eat. We figured out the plastic diet as she sought it out at our house when we brought her home. She would sleep with her head half in her bowl of food worried that it may get away from her. If she could see the bottom of her food bowl, she would cry and shake and have a full blown panic attack. It was sad to watch. We would (or I would) scurry around quickly to meet her needs so she would calm down. Clearly, she was traumatized and didn't yet trust her new digs. Over time as the food bowl was always full to the brim and the water was cool and fresh daily and the pets and hugs were readily available when she wanted them, she began "head booping" the walls and doorways of the house. That's a sign of affection and trust from a cat. Then she took a shine to Joe and would lay on the floor next to his feet and occasionally bite a toe. Then it was an occasional visit on the couch, at a distance but there just the same. It was a slow and careful attempt at trust over a long time that brought her to where she is today. Today she is up in the bedroom at 6am screaming for us to get up and change her water. She steals my seat on the couch. She lays in the general pathways in the house so we have to step over her. She sleeps with her head in my shoes. If I lay down a basket for a second in between trips to get veggies from the garden she hops in and goes to sleep. She follows me like a dog, talking the whole time and trying to trip me up. She can't wait for Joe or I to sit down, as she plops as tightly as she possibly can to us...She loves to get on the bed and sleep on my feet... Needless to say she has come to a place of trust with her humans.
Gotta say, it took a lot of patience and love to bring this little kitten to a place where she could enjoy her life and rest in the fact that her needs would be met and there would be no more dumpsters to be locked in. I can't even imagine how much God has had to do to get me to the same place. So many dumpsters in my life.... They all had to be dealt with. And in each one was trauma, trauma, trauma and more trauma. Can't say I'm '' head-booping" the walls, but I am certainly in a better place than I was for the first 2/3 of my life!!!! All that to say this.....We have an AMAZING God who pursues us and wants to spend time with us and wants to meet our needs and wants us to heal from the past. He is so patient with our brokenness and so understanding of our stubbornness. Nothing stops Him from beckoning us to come close. He just keeps trying..and trying...and that's what won me over...just like little Dumpster.... I found someone I could trust, someone that was always there for me...someone who loved me through my brokenness and out of my heartache.
And as for Dumpster...I totally get it... because I just want to curl up on His lap and rest.
by
Pastor Teena Lancellotti